Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
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