then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Randomize
