I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Randomize
