Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I'm getting married
To pizza
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
