As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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