mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
Sponge bath it is.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
so much tequila, so little girl.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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