girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Randomize
