I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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