i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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