dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
kristin has been a bad kristin
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Randomize
