We should be called the Road Head Warriors
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
Randomize
