Tell her she can't have a vagina
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Randomize
