i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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