and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Randomize
