Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
