i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
