yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
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