Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
