I murdered the dance floor call the cops
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Randomize
