They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
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