And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize
