she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Randomize
