Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Randomize
