would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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