dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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