I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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