I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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