And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
only you would photoshop your dick
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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