so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
