She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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