sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
Randomize