I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Randomize
