Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
i think i just lost a toe
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
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