I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
