I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Randomize
