I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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