theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Boobs speak an international language.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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