one word: firstdatebathroomanal
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
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