Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Randomize
