Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
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