dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
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