You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Randomize
