im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
Randomize
