so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
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