Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Randomize
