Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
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