What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
This beer is not sobering me up at all
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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