and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
