My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
I JUST MACED MY OWN FACE
This is by far the best text I have ever woken up to.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
