I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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